If You Love It This Much It Must Be Obsession — The Rule That's Still Running Your Life

In the Magic Spot, where Mikao Usui was said to be.

Japan brought my tea obsession back full force. Red bean tea, green tea, so much matcha my whole body lit up.

It also brought back a memory I hadn't thought about in years.

When I first went into recovery from my eating disorder, I stopped eating chocolate and desserts completely, for close to eight years. It helped. My head cleared. Something that felt dangerously out of control finally went quiet. I don't regret it.

But it planted something else. A belief that took much longer to find: loving something meant I'd eventually have to give it up. That real pleasure was a warning sign, not a gift.

I remember a tea house in Boston, five different chais lined up between me and the man I was dating, one of my favorite afternoons of my life. I heard myself say, I'm probably going to have to give this up eventually. He asked why. I loved it. I didn't have an answer, because the real one was sitting underneath, unsaid: if I love something this much, it must be obsession, and obsession has to go.

That equation is still running for most women reading this. Not as a thought you'd say out loud. As a rule your nervous system follows without asking you first: want it less, or pay for it later.

That rule doesn't loosen because you decide to think differently about tea, or chocolate, or anything else on your plate. It loosens when the fear underneath it gets addressed directly, the imprint that decided pleasure was dangerous in the first place. That's the actual work, and it's the only thing that moves it.

Every year you spend managing your enjoyment instead of feeling it is a year spent protecting yourself from a version of you that was never coming back the way you think she will.

The matcha in Japan tasted incredible. I let it. No countdown, no bill coming due.

You don't need another year of proving you can control this. You need the fear underneath it addressed, so control stops being the only tool you have.

Apply for a private Food and Body Alignment Consult below. Let's find what's actually still running the show.: CLICK HERE

Love,

Marla